WHAT I LEARNED FROM THE PRINCESS BRIDE; A Sonnet penned in admiration

You showed me that heroic thrills,
when told just right, could cure my ills,
You made me think books were okay,
as long as there was film segue,
You made me smile and want to be,
violently kidnapped while at sea,
So I could learn some good sword-play,
and randomly show up again someday,
You made me wish I could wear a mask
in a time where people didn't ask:
"Hey, what are you, some kinda' nut?"
or "Are you trying to hold us up?"
There is no time for selfish vanity
when you climb the cliffs of insanity,
Because you may need the helping hand
of a guy who thinks you killed his old man,
You can always count on friends
like a Spaniard, a giant, and Robin Wright Penn,
You made me fear life-sucking widgets
built by men with extra didgets,
You taught me to avoid such messes
as Asian land-wars and R. O. U. S.es,
You showed me health and good nutrition,
and how to haggle with magicians,
Educational in your very essence
with big words like inconcievable and putrescence,
Your dialogue was blatently part sub-textual,
and Humperdink was latently homosexual,
(Nothing was learned in that last line.
I just thought it was an exceptional rhyme),
You taught if I'm looking for a tree with a door,
I can just blindly poke around with a sword,
And if you tie a girl up and you gag her,
she'll later threaten you with a dagger,
If you're seeking "an eye for an eye" ,
allow someone time to prepare to die,
I knew when I found my true love
we'd fit just like a FIVE fingered glove,
And I found out that young Fred Savage
could act only slightly above average,
But no way he could be a dumbo
when his grandpa is Columbo,
The premise of this blog is quite thin,
but I can't seem to get out again,
I'm feeling much like Dr. Seuss,
but with the talent much reduced,
I think my thoughts are rhyming now;
a thing I simply can't allow,
I'm close to pulling out my hair.
I feel I'm in the pit of despair,
Which brings us back to Princess Bride,
a subject which should long have died,
I've got to stop this now or soon.
If I can't then I am doomed,
To live a life a little too lyrical,
Great! Now aliteration!! I need a miracle,
Alright, now, I'm gonna' stop rhyming. I mean it..........................
Anybody want a peanut?